Friday, January 4, 2013

Hello, 2013!

I'm a list maker. It's my thing.

My favorite gift is a notebook and a new pen. Not those smeary kinds...I'm talking a good solid ball point pen.

Then I make lists. Lots and lots of lists.

So when New Year rolls around, I get excited!

Yes, I'm into the whole resolution thing. Mostly because it involves making a list!

Also because I need a fresh start. Whether it's on the first of the year, the first of the month, or next Tuesday, I need a fresh start.

This is MY year. This year is my family's year. We will conquer it. We will own it. We will revel in the excitement and experiences and challenges and moments.

Good or bad, I'm taking it all in.

Part of me feels a bit nervous to be excited and open to the possibilities. I think I keep peering around the corner waiting for the other shoe to drop.

But I can't live like that anymore.

Living now, right here, in this moment.

So my resolutions! Or goals. Or plans. Whatever you want to call it, I got 'em.

1. Be more patient. Yell less. Pretty self-explanatory. I am just like any other Super Mama - we all get frustrated and anxious and sometimes our littles just happen to not follow directions at the same time that mama is having a moment and...well, yeah. Sometimes I yell. Sometimes it's not even deserved. Then I'm left feeling like the worst mama in the world. So this year, I am going to push myself to be more patient. I realize that I will not be perfect at this, and that's okay. I want to be aware and work harder at it. My littles each have their own unique obstacles to overcome currently, and it's often hard to remember that the reason they may not be listening or following directions could quite possibly be because of these obstacles and not because they are ignoring me. This is a big one for me, which is why it's number one. I hope in a year from now to have an even happier home because mama thought a little bit first before opening her big mouth.

2. Start my business. YES. This is going to happen! March 1, 2013. DONE. More information as the time nears. ;)

3. Make my home a healthy home. We seem to be the rare house these days. My kids have never had to go to the doctor for a sick visit, they have never been on antibiotics. I have purposely made lifestyle changes and decisions to directly benefit their health. But when it comes to what we eat and what products we use, I'm not quite there. This is the year I really dive into the health world. I want to eat GOOD food that is GOOD for you. Though I'm healthy according to every standard blood test done by my doctor, I'm not HEALTHY. I don't FEEL good. I'm in pain every day. I'd rather lay in bed than get up because getting up physically hurts. I'm finally going to take my health into my own hands! This involves a number of things, but first and foremost is changing the food we eat. I'm excited to eat clean! I'm excited to feel better, to be better, to do more. We've made some changes with the chemicals used in our home, and I will continue to make those changes this year. My mom sometimes calls me a hippie...and yeah, I'm pretty much okay with that! Green, crunchy, call me whatever! When you know better, you do better.

4. Lose weight. This goes with number three. Eating better food and getting exercise is high on my list of priorities. I have a number in mind I'd like to get to one day, but for right now, I just want to feel better. Only way to make that happen is to do some work on myself.

5. Make my relationship with the hubby a priority. Oh how easy it is to let this one slide! He's a great man, a great daddy, a great husband. Because we are going, going, going trying to keep ourselves afloat, the time spent with each other is not always quality time. We do see each other every evening after the kids go to bed, and we often spend that time catching up and cuddling up to some movies, but it's broken up between nightmares and barking dogs and nursing babies. I plan to make a point of the two of us getting out together...just us!...more often, and making the time together at home a little more special from time to time.

6. More family time. We've gotten away from this over the last year. I think between the stress of life and having a new baby and every other event over the last year, quality family time disappeared. I think we all missed it. Movie nights, game nights, going out to eat together, trips to the museum and the zoo, all good stuff.

7. Spend more time with our extended family. Sometimes it's hard to fit it all in, and when you come from two very big families, it's hard to find the time. I'm not planning on visiting every single member of our family every single weekend, but I want to make an effort to visit more often. To send notes and cards, to make actual phone calls (instead of just "liking" a comment on facebook!). Life is too short, we need to spend time with the ones we love while we can.

8. Volunteer. This is a big one for me. I want to spend my time volunteering, individually as well as with my family. I've already volunteered to help with a project this month (more on that later!). We also have a local food pantry that I've signed my entire family up to help out at.

9. Continue with school. I say continue because it's true, I have fallen off the wagon a time or two...or more. I've done great for a year or two and then life happens, and here I am, 10 years after graduating high school, still going to college. I have one more semester to go to complete the business certificate I was working toward, and I plan to make that happen.

10. Budget. What? What's that word? Yeah, I know, I've never heard of it, either. Which explains a lot, really! This is the year of financial security. Or at least financial sanity! We have plans to budget, to pay off old debts, and to get ourselves in a position to make some big changes for our family in the next few years.

11. Go to church. I grew up in a home where I went to church every Sunday. I went to a school where I went to church every Friday. I did double time for years. Somewhere along the way, the idea of waking up and getting the kids ready and driving became too much. I feel a little empty in the faith department sometimes, and I want to feel renewed. God is present in my life, absolutely, but I want that connection to be deeper. I think part of the reason that we've fallen away from church is because we moved away from the church I've attended for my entire life. The church where I was married, the church where all three of my babies were baptized. I know that we need to find a church where we are now, and it's bittersweet. But the time has come, I can't avoid it anymore, I need this. I need a place to call home.

12. Teach my children values. That's our job as the parents, right? Instill in our children values. What values? I need to identify those. I want them to be kind and gracious, giving and caring, helpful and considerate, among many other things. But what am I doing about it? Do I model those behaviors and values for my kids? Maybe. Sometimes. Certainly not always, and maybe not even all that often. How else will they learn? They need to see me be the person I want them to be. Subsequently, I will become the person I want to become. Score!

13. Positivity! That's my motto for 2013. Positivity only! If I can't contribute positively to a conversation, I won't respond. I will not gossip or talk negatively about people. I will see the glass half full at all times. I won't allow negative energy in my home and in my life and in my heart. I'm generally a positive person, but I've realized that a lot of that energy has been sucked away by the negativity that I allow around me. I have the choice to be and say and do whatever I choose, and I can choose to be happy and I can choose to be positive. I will contribute only positivity to the world this year.

So there we go! 13 for 2013. Perfect!

I don't find resolutions to be hindering in any way. I don't find them to be a reminder of what I will fail at this year. I know I won't be perfect. Am I perfect at anything, really? Not a chance! So what this becomes is a road map to the person I want to be this year. A vision of the life I want to create for my children this year. Placing my priorities on what really matters instead of wasting my energy on things I cannot change.

It's good, people. Resolutions are good. Goals are good. Change is good. Allow yourself to become the person you were meant to be this year.

So, there you go, 2013. Bring it on!

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